Analysts Quickly Up Earnings Estimates DEARBORN, MICH. (SatireWire.com) – Ford’s stock quadrupled yesterday after the automotive giant announced it agreed to sell 20 percent of the company to the Lord…
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Firm Issues 1000th Study on How Big Corporations Lag the Internet STAMFORD, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – Consulting firm META Group made history today after an independent panel of judges confirmed its…
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Analysts Skeptical; Doubt Insurers Equipped to Handle Job MINNEAPOLIS, MINN. (SatireWire.com) – Moving into what insurance executives concede is “uncharted territory,” five of the nation’s leading HMOs announced yesterday they…
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Rowdy Yahtzee Players Told to Keep it Down LAKE BENTON, MINN. (SatireWire.com) – A chorus of satisfied sighs wafted across the endless fields and farms of this southwest Minnesota town…
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Cell Phone Industry Group Launches Public Service Campaign NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Under pressure to do something about car accidents involving cell phones, the industry-backed Cell Phone Safety Council…
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Intel Wants to Form Gintel Alliance; Greenspan Warns of “Ginger Bubble” MANCHESTER, N.H. (SatireWire.com) – Although only a handful of people know the secret identity of “Ginger” – a product…
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Network Efficiencies Could Lead to Prolonged “Dream Recession,” Say Experts CAMBRIDGE, MASS. (SatireWire.com) – Economic theorists and high tech executives today predicted a downturn in the unprecedented New Economy will…
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At Balmerton Industries, They’re Doing Some Weird Shit Albany, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Mitch Gruleman sighs as only a burly, bearded man dressed in a white taffeta fairy costume and wielding…
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Federal Reserve Not So Reserved Anymore Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Proving the Federal Reserve is anything but reserved, U.S. central bank governors this week announced they had dropped interest rates,…
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Company, Like President, Indiscreet; Should Get Same Killer Deal, Says Ballmer Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Only hours after President Clinton struck a deal to avoid prosecution by admitting he lied…
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