ON “SARCASTIC SIDELINES” WEEKEND, YOUTH PLAYERS ARE "JUST AWESOME"

OVERLAND PARK, KAN. (SatireWire.com) -- “Sarcastic Sidelines” is back – the annual youth soccer weekend where the incessant gripes, jeers, and screams of parents make way for ironic applause, back-handed… Read more

BILL ALLOWS PILOTS TO CARRY GUNS; NOW TWO THINGS IN COCKPIT WILL BE LOADED

America West Crews Can Now Pop a Cap on a Cold One Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The U.S. House of Representatives this week overwhelmingly passed a bill allowing flight crews… Read more

REVOLUTION COMES AT INCONVENIENT TIME

Lack of Bourgeoisie Cooperation, Strong TV Lineup, Turn Back Universal Uprising Everywhere (SatireWire.com) – The long-awaited Revolution, when the oppressed and disenfranchised break the chains of economic servitude and social… Read more

Report That Pessimists Die Sooner No Big Surprise to Pessimists

“People who are overly pessimistic tend to have worse health long-term than their more positive peers, US researchers report.” – Reuters, Aug. 13 New York (SatireWire.com) – A study issued… Read more

Friends Recall Gist of Cliffs Notes Founder

Lincoln, Neb. (SatireWire.com) – Cliffs Notes founder Clifton Hillegass, born 1918, founded Cliffs Notes 1958, sold in 1998, died Saturday, age 83. Hillegass served in Army, had idea for Cliffs… Read more

EDUCATORS FIGHT TO PROTECT SELF-ESTEEM OF GOOFY LOSER KIDS

“In this game, there is a ‘victim’ or ‘It,’ which creates a self-esteem issue. The oldest or biggest child usually dominates.” – A California school principal explaining why the game… Read more

MEDIA CONVICTS MEDIA OF UNFAIRLY CONVICTING MEDIA IN MEDIA

Media Site Inside.com to Launch InsideInside.com to Cover Itself Covering Itself New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – In what the media termed a “healthy display of detached introspection,” the media today… Read more

Michael Jackson Still Thinks He's Black

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Appearing with the Rev. Al Sharpton over the weekend, pop star Michael Jackson slammed the music industry for its treatment of black artists, saying generations… Read more

Californians Start Email Campaign for Energy Conservation

Sacramento, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Californians, faced with an energy crisis fueled by high-tech power consumption, have launched an email campaign urging fellow computer users to stay off their computers. Days… Read more

OBESE PASSENGERS DEMAND RIGHT TO EAT PERSON IN NEXT SEAT

“Southwest Airlines is under fire for its policy of charging overweight passengers for two tickets if they spill over into their neighbor’s seat.” – AP, June 20, 2002 Policy Would… Read more
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