Net Company to Hold Second IPO

San Francisco (SatireWire.com) – PeoplePC, whose initial public offering bombed last month, said today its first IPO shouldn’t count, and urged investors to return their shares so the company can… Read more

Russian-Pizza Hut Rocket Explodes; Thin Crust Blamed

Astana, Kazakhstan (SatireWire.com) – The Pizza Hut-sponsored Russian rocket carrying international space station equipment exploded while in orbit today, just days after its launch. Russian Space Agency officials immediately blamed… Read more

THE GREENSPAN EFFECT

DEC 11 St. Louis (Satirewire.com) – Anheuser-Busch, the nation’s largest alcoholic beverage producer, filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy yesterday after Federal Reserve Board Chairman Alan Greenspan reportedly switched his drink… Read more

STUDY FINDS YOU REALLY DON'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE

In Grand Scheme of Things, Your Hard Work, Diligence, Found to Mean Squat London, England (SatireWire.com) – In an unprecedented study, British and American researchers have concluded that despite what… Read more

PHILIP MORRIS TO CHANGE NAME TO ALTRIA; LUNG CANCER TO CHANGE NAME TO PHILIP MORRIS

Rebranded Disease Gains Universal Negative Brand Imagery New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Just days after Philip Morris declared it will change its name to the Altria Group, lung cancer today… Read more

EUROPE NOT USED TO NOT BEING IGNORED

G.E.’s Acquiescence Threatens Delicate Balance of Transatlantic Mutual Disdain The Hague (SatireWire.com) – Europe and the U.S. are said to be furious with General Electric after the American firm hinted… Read more

SUN RELEASES OFFICIAL MICROSOFT STANCE

Reusable Statement Expected to Save Time, Money PALO ALTO, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In an effort to streamline corporate communications and eliminate redundancy, Sun Microsystems today issued what it called its… Read more

MCI Offers New "Friends and Family and FBI" Plan

Clinton, Miss. (SatireWire.com) – Promising to save you money on the calls you make the most, MCI today unveiled its new “Friends and Family and FBI” plan, allowing customers to… Read more

Business-To-Unemployment (B2U) Dubbed Next Big Thing

San Jose, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – It’s taken a couple of years for the Next Big Thing in e-business to reveal itself, but after another massive wave of dot-com cutbacks this… Read more

Dot-Coms Just Dying to Get Prized OTC Listings

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – In an emerging trend analysts are comparing to the IPO mania of 1998-1999, publicly-traded Internet companies are leaving the Nasdaq in a mad rush to… Read more
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