ELLISON TO GRADS: DIPLOMAS ARE FOR LOSERS

Oracle CEO Urges Students to Drop out, Start up NEW HAVEN, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – In one of the more controversial commencement addresses in memory, Oracle CEO and college dropout Larry… Read more

ENRON CEO KEN LAY'S NEWEST VENTURE

CLICK HERE TO READ RELATED NEWS STORY ______________________________________________________ ENERGY NATIONAL RESOURCE ORGANIZATION of NIGERIA URGENT BUSINESS PROPOSAL PERSONAL AND CONFIDENTIAL From: Mr. Chairman Kenneth Lay Office of E.N.R.O.N. Director Dear… Read more

CONSULTANCY WINS "E-GURGITATE" AWARD

Firm Issues 1000th Study on How Big Corporations Lag the Internet STAMFORD, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – Consulting firm META Group made history today after an independent panel of judges confirmed its… Read more

MICROSOFT SAYS LINUX HAS NO FUTURE, SO LINUX INDUSTRY WILL STOP

Despite Gains in Market Share, Linux Firms To Call It Quits Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Chastened Linux executives pledged to stop their “crazy dreaming” and disband their efforts after an… Read more

World Bank Wants to Help Afghans Amass Staggering Debt Burden

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The World Bank this week said it plans to extend loans to rebuild Afghanistan once a new government is installed, a pledge bank officials and Afghan… Read more

CEO Surprises Employees

Denver, Colo (SatireWire.com) – As the CEO of b2b software firm Archimetrix, Janine Radcliffe had a serious new economy problem. Despite organizing action teams to implement action plans, despite reducing… Read more

2001 Mazda Metaphor a Hit with Symbolic Car Buyers

Detriot, Mich. (SatireWire.com) – Targeting consumers who would like a new car but can’t afford one, Mazda yesterday introduced the 2001 Metaphor – a vehicle the company described as a… Read more

Fired eBay Employees Auctioned Off

San Jose, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – As part of the staff cuts it announced yesterday, online auction site eBay said it will not release its employees outright, but will auction them… Read more

KELLOGG'S NAILED FOR BUNDLING

Battle Creek, Mich. (SatireWire.com) – Emboldened by its success against Microsoft, the U.S. Justice Department yesterday accused cereal giant Kellogg’s of “anti-competitive, anti-consumer” practices related to the bundling of small… Read more

AT&T TO CUT WORKFORCE 120 PERCENT

NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) -- AT&T will reduce its workforce by an unprecedented 120 percent by the end of 2001, believed to be the first time a major corporation has… Read more
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