VENEZUELA V. IMF

VENEZUELA V. IMF, ROUND I Caracas (Satirewire.com) – In the face of increasing pressure from the International Monetary Fund to get its finances in order, the Venezuelan Finance Ministry announced… Read more

AT&T NOT IN SERVICE AT THIS TIME

Cutback Program’s ‘Remarkable Success’ Cited for Demise NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Less than one year after AT&T’s surprise decision to eliminate 120 percent of its workforce, (see story), the… Read more

CONGRESS FORBIDS ECONOMY TO RECOVER UNTIL CONGRESS PASSES BILL TO HELP ECONOMY RECOVER

“Mississippi Sen. Trent Lott, the Republican leader, said he thought that `we need to fish or cut bait (on a stimulus package) this coming week’ because there are indications the… Read more

MOSKOWITZS AGAIN TOP SALARY SURVEY

‘Robert Moskowitz’ now 4th Most Popular Name for Newborns DENVER, COL. (SatireWire.com) – The average salary for people named Robert Moskowitz continues to outpace the per capita income of the… Read more

WOULD PRICELINE OR YAHOO GET FUNDED TODAY?

How Venture Capitalists Would React If Today’s Big-Shots Were Start-Ups STAMFORD, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – It’s often said that if someone approached the FDA with aspirin today, the product would never… Read more

Lucent Stays Focused on Losing Money

Murray Hill, N.J. (SatireWire.com) – In the most hopeful sign yet that the American economy may be returning to normal, Lucent Technologies posted another staggering quarterly loss on Tuesday. Lucent… Read more

GE Succession Losers Demand Recount

Fairfield, Conn. (SatireWire.com) – The two General Electric executives who lost out when GE’s Jack Welch named Jeffrey Immelt to succeed him as CEO demanded that Welch recount his vote… Read more

Net Company to Hold Second IPO

San Francisco (SatireWire.com) – PeoplePC, whose initial public offering bombed last month, said today its first IPO shouldn’t count, and urged investors to return their shares so the company can… Read more

Russian-Pizza Hut Rocket Explodes; Thin Crust Blamed

Astana, Kazakhstan (SatireWire.com) – The Pizza Hut-sponsored Russian rocket carrying international space station equipment exploded while in orbit today, just days after its launch. Russian Space Agency officials immediately blamed… Read more

THE GREENSPAN EFFECT

DEC 11 St. Louis (Satirewire.com) – Anheuser-Busch, the nation’s largest alcoholic beverage producer, filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy yesterday after Federal Reserve Board Chairman Alan Greenspan reportedly switched his drink… Read more
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