TRUMP CANCELS 2018 MIDTERMS TO THWART RUSSIAN MEDDLING

WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to keep Russia from interfering with democracy, the Trump administration today announced it has cancelled the 2018 mid-term elections. Read more

TRUMP WILL DEPLOY RUSSIAN TROOPS TO PURGE U.S. DEEP STATE

President Donald Trump today accepted an offer by Russian President Vladimir Putin to use “impartial” Russian troops to root out the so-called “Deep State” within the U.S. government. Read more

For White Men to Survive, We Need to Start Acting Like Prey

In order to survive, we straight, white, Christian males need to stop acting like predators and begin acting like prey. Read more

TEENAGER USES ROY MOORE DEFENSE

FATHER: Son, did you steal $20 from your mother’s purse? SON: No. Read more

CONGRESSIONAL COAT-CHECK NOW ALSO ACCEPTING BALLS

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The congressional cloakroom, where representatives and senators traditionally check their hats and coats, will also now accept congressmen’s balls. Read more

FENCE JUMPER ARRESTED TRYING TO BREAK OUT OF WHITE HOUSE

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- The U.S. Secret Service today apprehended a man they said was attempting to scale the White House fence in order to break out. Read more

SATIREWIRE UNVEILS ‘TRUMP TRANSPOSED’ ON TWITTER

Exact anagrams of the daily tweets of Mr. Sudden Sad Trout Nipple… er… U.S. President Donald Trump. Read more

SHIT APPROACHING FAN

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) - Scientists monitoring catastrophic inevitability said today the shit is fast approaching the fan and will almost certainly hit the fan by the 20th of January. Read more

TRUMP APPOINTS ANGRY, RACIST COFFEE MUG TO TRANSITION TEAM

NEW YORK, NY (SatireWire.com) - In the latest staff shakeup, President-elect Donald Trump today reportedly replaced key members of his transition team with an angry, racist coffee mug. Read more

ELECTION CHANGES POLITICAL LANDSCAPE INSIDE MARRIAGE

RICHMOND, VA – Donald Trump’s shock election has dramatically shifted the political landscape in the home of Deirdre and Scott Taylor of Richmond, Va., as Scott's vote for Trump has… Read more
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