Israel Says Arafat Can Come Out, Really

Jerusalem (SatireWire.com) – Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat, who had been confined to the West Bank city of Ramallah for three months and survived repeated Israeli attacks on his headquarters, was… Read more

OVEREAGER, CANADA SENDS SMOKESCREEN OVER U.S. BEFORE CANADIAN INVASION PLANS FINISHED

“Propelled by strong winds from the north, the fires have created a plume of smoke from Michigan to Massachusetts that’s visible as far south as Washington, D.C.” – National Post,… Read more

U.S. PROMISES TO CONSULT ALLIES BEFORE DOING WHAT IT WAS GOING TO DO ANYWAY

Pledges Not to Move Alone Unless It Does Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Bowing to international pressure not to act unilaterally, the United States reversed course today and promised to consult… Read more

Al Qaeda Proposes $249.98 Military Budget

Afghanistan (SatireWire.com) – In response to U.S. President George Bush’s $379 billion proposed military budget, which calls for high-tech weaponry such as pilotless spy aircraft and a missile shield, al… Read more

BUSH LAYS OUT TOUGH TERMS FOR PALESTINE TO MAKE WORLD CUP BY 2006

Arab Neighbors Suddenly Opposed to New Country in Qualifying Rounds Kananaskis, Canada (SatireWire.com) – U.S. President George Bush today said Palestinians should elect new leaders and adopt sweeping reforms if… Read more

FBI TO ISSUE 5-DAY TERROR FORECASTS

(Ed Note: One month after this story appeared on SatireWire, the U.S. Department of Homeland Security began issuing color-coded terrorist threat level advisories.) Recognizable Format Should Make It Easier for… Read more

AP, Reuters in Pitched Spelling Battle

London (SatireWire.com) – The war for Afghanistan intensified today as rival factions from Reuters and the Associated Press launched vicious attacks against one another over whether the United States is… Read more

TERRORISTS MARRYING FOREST SERVICE WORKERS

“A U.S. Forest Service worker admitted sparking the biggest wildfire in Colorado history when she burned a letter from her estranged husband in the bone-dry Pike National Forest a week… Read more

U.S. "GROSSLY UNPREPARED" FOR UNLIKELY THREATS

No Plans in Place to Deal with Drying Up of Oceans, Giant Moon Explosion, Or Potential for Everyone to Be Pecked to Death Like in “The Birds” Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com)… Read more

Senate Bill Declares Bush No Longer Goofy

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Continuing to display its new spirit of patriotism and bipartisanship, the United States Senate today overwhelmingly passed a resolution declaring that President George W. Bush is… Read more
WordPress Appliance - Powered by TurnKey Linux