Wrigley Launches "Internet Bubble" Gum®

Chicago, Ill. (SatireWire.com) – The world’s biggest chewing gum maker today unveiled Wrigley’s Internet Bubble Gum®, the “irrationally overpriced gum” that produces an “unsustainably large” bubble. The gum, which went… Read more

Bush Pledges Republican Internet If Elected

Philadelphia, Pa. (SatireWire.com) – In a speech accepting his party’s nomination, George W. Bush pledged to wrest control of the Internet from its creator, Vice President Al Gore, and turn… Read more

Firms Hire Jerks to Improve Customer Service

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Taking their cue from Internet companies that have recently hired hackers to improve site security, several struggling online firms announced today they will hire unbearably… Read more

Firestone Peels Back Prices In Tire Sale Blowout!

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Bridgestone- Firestone Inc. today announced the launch of a nationwide “tire sale blowout” on its P235/75R15 size radial ATX and ATX II tires, as well as… Read more

Lucent Finds New COO On Stock Message Boards

New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Lucent Technologies today announced it has ended its search for a new chief operating officer with the surprise hiring of Stockpicker_Dude_78, a frequent poster on… Read more

'I Love You' Email Recipient Still Waits For Flowers, Phone Call

Dallas, Texas (SatireWire.com) – It’s been three months since Angelina Dupree received an email declaring “I Love You,” but the 33-year-old divorcee said today she’s given up hope of ever… Read more

King's e-Book Plants Virus

Bangor, Maine (SatireWire.com) – Novelist Stephen King, who expects 1.5 million people to download his e-book, The Plant, announced today he will publish an online sequel called The Virus, what… Read more

Hackers Attack Air-Traffic Control Centers, Cause "On-Time Chaos"

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – A congressional report warning that U.S. air traffic control is vulnerable to computer attack proved true today, as hackers broke into several control center computers, wreaking… Read more

Lieberman Sits Shiva For Dead Dot-Com

Austin, Texas (SatireWire.com) – In an apparent effort to win support from the Internet industry, Democratic vice presidential candidate Joseph Lieberman sat shiva yesterday with executives of online furniture retailer… Read more

Telecom Merger Will Create First "Single Phone Company"

San Antonio, Texas (SatireWire.com) – In a landmark decision expected to create an unprecedented “single, nationwide phone company,” a federal judge yesterday approved the merger of BellSouth, SBC, Sprint, Verizon,… Read more
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