GORE PUTS INTERNET UP FOR SALE ON EBAY

Expects $400 Billion Bid for His Baby WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Vice President Al Gore has put the Internet up for sale on auction site eBay, explaining that while he… Read more

NETIZEN FEARS HACKERS WILL STEAL HIS VISA CARD NO. 8099 0788 341 9800 EXP. 12/01

New Privacy Study Reveals Consumer Concerns, Addresses, Phone Numbers CARSON CITY, NEV. (SatireWire.com) – Nelson Shank has been online since 1998, but according to a new report by the Internet… Read more

SUN RELEASES OFFICIAL MICROSOFT STANCE

Reusable Statement Expected to Save Time, Money PALO ALTO, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In an effort to streamline corporate communications and eliminate redundancy, Sun Microsystems today issued what it called its… Read more

WOULD PRICELINE OR YAHOO GET FUNDED TODAY?

How Venture Capitalists Would React If Today’s Big-Shots Were Start-Ups STAMFORD, CONN. (SatireWire.com) – It’s often said that if someone approached the FDA with aspirin today, the product would never… Read more

SO LONG DOT-COM, HELLO DOT-MUSEUM!

ICANN Meets Urgent Demand by Adding .Aero, .Coop, and .Museum Domains MARINA DEL RAY, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In an historic vote Thursday, the agency that oversees the Internet address system… Read more

MOST WON'T REMEMBER DAY LINUX 2.4 RELEASED

Long-Awaited Operating System Upgrade Not Up There with JFK Assassination SANTA CLARA, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In a study hardcore computer enthusiasts find “repulsive and unconscionable,” at least 99.9 percent of… Read more

DOTCOM CHAIN LETTER REALLY WORKS!

With a Minimal Investment, Net Companies Finally Raking in Real Cash! *********************************************************** DO NOT DELETE THIS! Print it, and read it! THIS “PROGRAM” REALLY WORKS!! ***************************************************************** A GENUINE PERSONAL NOTE… Read more

MICROSOFT SAYS LINUX HAS NO FUTURE, SO LINUX INDUSTRY WILL STOP

Despite Gains in Market Share, Linux Firms To Call It Quits Redmond, Wash. (SatireWire.com) – Chastened Linux executives pledged to stop their “crazy dreaming” and disband their efforts after an… Read more

LAYOFFS, STOCK DROPS PROVE FIRMS BOASTING THEY'D BE "NEXT AMAZON" WERE RIGHT

Some Even Outperform Amazon.com’s Underperformance Reston, Va. (SatireWire.com) – Investors know Internet companies often can’t back up their promises, but one common boast has some dot-com executives crowing “I told… Read more

COURT ORDERS NAPSTER TO STOP AS SOON AS JUDGES FINISH DOWNLOADING PINK FLOYD, RICKY MARTIN

Napster Servers Too Busy for Judges to Get Songs They Wanted San Francisco, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – In a 2-to-1 decision, the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ordered song-swapping service Napster… Read more
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