Volvo With Spoiler Still Just Volvo

Columbus, Ohio (SatireWire.com) – Forty-two-year-old accounting executive Marvin Cohen had a rear spoiler installed on his four-door Volvo S80 sedan yesterday in the mistaken belief that it would somehow make… Read more

REVIEW NAMES TOP 10 PARTY PRESCHOOLS

Preparing for College Needs to Start Early, Say Publishers Princeton, N.J. (SatireWire.com) – Already vilified for its collegiate Top 10 party school rankings, which some claim glorify drinking on campus,… Read more

ATLANTA NOW LESS BUSY, FINALLY HAS TIME TO HATE

Business Slowdown Frees Up Time to Take Part in Prejudice, Discrimination Atlanta, Ga. (SatireWire.com) – According to a new federal report, Atlanta, which has long billed itself as the racially… Read more

Sites Offer Large Print for Old People

Sarasota, Fla. (SatireWire.com) – Reacting to new studies claiming people aged 55 and older are the fastest growing segment of new Internet users, hundreds of Web sites have begun offering… Read more

BILL ALLOWS PILOTS TO CARRY GUNS; NOW TWO THINGS IN COCKPIT WILL BE LOADED

America West Crews Can Now Pop a Cap on a Cold One Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The U.S. House of Representatives this week overwhelmingly passed a bill allowing flight crews… Read more

REVOLUTION COMES AT INCONVENIENT TIME

Lack of Bourgeoisie Cooperation, Strong TV Lineup, Turn Back Universal Uprising Everywhere (SatireWire.com) – The long-awaited Revolution, when the oppressed and disenfranchised break the chains of economic servitude and social… Read more

Report That Pessimists Die Sooner No Big Surprise to Pessimists

“People who are overly pessimistic tend to have worse health long-term than their more positive peers, US researchers report.” – Reuters, Aug. 13 New York (SatireWire.com) – A study issued… Read more

Friends Recall Gist of Cliffs Notes Founder

Lincoln, Neb. (SatireWire.com) – Cliffs Notes founder Clifton Hillegass, born 1918, founded Cliffs Notes 1958, sold in 1998, died Saturday, age 83. Hillegass served in Army, had idea for Cliffs… Read more

EDUCATORS FIGHT TO PROTECT SELF-ESTEEM OF GOOFY LOSER KIDS

“In this game, there is a ‘victim’ or ‘It,’ which creates a self-esteem issue. The oldest or biggest child usually dominates.” – A California school principal explaining why the game… Read more

MEDIA CONVICTS MEDIA OF UNFAIRLY CONVICTING MEDIA IN MEDIA

Media Site Inside.com to Launch InsideInside.com to Cover Itself Covering Itself New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – In what the media termed a “healthy display of detached introspection,” the media today… Read more
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