U.S. Drops Cats Into Belgium

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Countering accusations from liberals and conservatives alike that U.S. policy in the Middle East has become “confused and incoherent,” the Bush administration today announced that it… Read more

Parker Bros. Replaces Monopoly Money With Cheaper Euro

Beverly, Mass. (SatireWire.com) – In an effort to cut production costs associated with its famous Monopoly board game, Parker Brothers announced today it will replace its colorful play dollars with… Read more

Australia Reclassifies Refugee Detainment as Sport

Woomera, Australia (SatireWire.com) – In a deft maneuver that effectively puts an end to protests over its policy of mandatory detention for refugees, the Australian government today declared the confinement… Read more

Still No Helmut Kohl Pics at Porn Sites

Los Angeles (SatireWire.com) – Former German Chancellor Helmut Kohl once again finished dead last in the latest PornoMetrix survey, which tracks the use of naked celebrity images on pornographic sites.… Read more

Bush Calls For Mideast Truce So U.S. Can Attack Iraq

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Complaining that the window of opportunity was closing, an exasperated President Bush today called on Israelis and Palestinians to declare an immediate cease fire in order… Read more

Israel Offers Palestinians Virtual State For Only $49.95 a Month

Jerusalem (SatireWire.com) – Proposing a compromise he hopes will ensure his nation’s security, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak announced Israel will allow the Palestinians to form an independent nation, but… Read more

Ships, Thatcher, No Longer "She"

London (SatireWire.com) – The shipping industry newspaper Lloyd’s List, one of the world’s oldest publications, announced Wednesday it will no longer use the feminine pronoun “she” when referring to ships,… Read more

Starving, Dying Poor to Get Much-Needed Net Access

Okinawa, Japan (SatireWire.com) – The world’s poorest nations reacted with elation yesterday after learning the G-8 economic powers have pledged to bring them into the digital economy by wiring their… Read more

Zimbabwe Challenger Shocked at Loss; Also Beaten

Harare, Zimbabwe (SatireWire.com) – Asked to comment Thursday about his loss to Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe in this week’s election, which has been called a fraud by many in the… Read more

IMF Rate Hike Suggestion Proves Hike Not Needed

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – In what analysts are calling “a definitive sign” that Fed rate hikes have indeed quelled the U.S. economy and are no longer necessary, the International Monetary… Read more
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