Bush Urges Unemployed to Be Patriotic, Stay Unemployed Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – A bleak jobless claims report released Thursday put the number of out of work Americans at its highest…
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Sardonic, Resentful Laughter Awaits Dotcommers Who Let Go Anger, Says Report Palo Alto, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Whether you’ve lost your job at a dotcom or your money investing in one, …
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Most Aggressive Move Yet Would Thin Out ‘Overgrown’ Sector WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Comparing the Internet to an uncontrolled and overcrowded forest, the Federal Reserve today authorized a “prescribed burn”…
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Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – In a new Gallup poll on the dehumanizing aspects of job loss, nearly 85 percent of the nation’s 2.96 million unemployed said they “agreed somewhat” or…
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New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – In a surprise concession, the Internet Advertising Bureau today acknowledged the banner ad is dead, but expressed confidence that its latest innovation, “Sponsorship Rectangles,” will…
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San Antonio, Texas (SatireWire.com) – In a landmark decision expected to create an unprecedented “single, nationwide phone company,” a federal judge yesterday approved the merger of BellSouth, SBC, Sprint, Verizon,…
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Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) — Federal Reserve Board Chairman Alan Greenspan, who told a London Evening Standard reporter last week he was “more popular than Jesus Christ,” apologized today to the…
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Newark, N.J. (SatireWire.com) – Continental Airlines, concerned over studies linking car phone use to traffic accidents, today moved to preempt similar incidents in the sky by banning the use of…
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Relationship Falls Well Below Expectations New York, N.Y. (SatireWire) – Laura Feldstein (Brooklyn, 24) today announced disappointing results in her relationship with skeezing loser boyfriend Derek McHugh (Brooklyn, 27) for…
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With Crackdown Mandate, Cops Randomly Hassling "People of White Collar" New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) -- Statistically speaking, David Bates had all the earmarks of a potential criminal: he was well-groomed,…
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