NEW YORK, NY (SatireWire.com) — Escalating his Twitter war on A-list celebrities, Donald Trump today called God “overrated” after Jewish online journal The Forward wrote that the president-elect was anointed by the electoral college and not the Almighty.
The seemingly innocuous mention in a four-sentence story nonetheless infuriated Trump, who unleashed a series of angry Twitter posts.
As the tweets were being posted, Trump surrogates were forced to defend their boss, often in real-time.
“It is ridiculous to claim President-Elect Trump is attacking God,” said advisor Kellyanne Conway, speaking on CNN after the first three posts appeared. “And by the way, isn’t it great to have a president who invokes the name of God to…”
“Excuse me, Kellyanne,” interrupted CNN’s Jake Tapper. “He just sent another tweet. It reads, ‘Failing God goes by so many names! Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah. You know who else uses aliases? Mexican drug lords!’ Kellyanne, you were saying?”
“Well, obviously, when he says the ‘Lord’ he is referring to… to criminals, drug lords, not the Lord Himself,’ Conway answered. “Really it is President Obama who has failed to…’
“I’m sorry, Kellyanne,” Tapper cut in. “Your boss has tweeted again. Look.”
Tapper turned again to Conway, who shifted uncomfortably.
“OK, well this… look, we all want what’s best for our children and Donald Trump, as he points out, is a great father,” she stated. “And he will be great for all Americans, young and old, male and female…”
Tapper again interjected, noting Trump had just tweeted:
“Right, OK, yes,” said Conway, composing herself. “So, when he says ‘women,’ he’s not referring to ALL women, of course, he just… tweeted again.”
“Indeed,” said Tapper.
After staring at her prompter for a few moments, Conway tried to explain.
“Well, President Elect-Trump is very proud of his businesses, which have been incredibly successful,” she said. “But let me reiterate that his great passion should in no way be interpreted to mean he thinks of himself as above…”
“He’s still going,” interrupted Tapper.
Tapper again turned to Conway, who checked her watch.
“I’m late for a meeting with my therapist,” she said, leaving the set.
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