FOX BLASTS OBAMA FOR LANDING ABORTION

ANDREWS AIR FORCE BASE, MD (SatireWire) -- A plane carrying First Lady Michelle Obama had to abort its landing Monday, quickly drawing fire from Fox News and Right to Land… Read more

CONTROLLERS: 'PILOTS PUT US TO SLEEP'

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Beleaguered air traffic controllers went on the offensive today, accusing pilots of purposely putting them to sleep by constantly speaking in that low-level, monotone mumble. Read more

HEROIC OIL COMPANIES OFFER TO FLY LIBYAN OIL TO SAFETY

TRIPOLI (SatireWire.com) – As chaos mounts in Libya, concerned petroleum firms across the globe have made a courageous pledge to fly all of Libya’s oil to safety. Read more

CHARLIE SHEEN TO HELP ARABS TAKE FREEDOM TO 'NEXT LEVEL’

CAIRO (SatireWire.com) – Pledging to help the Arab world take freedom “to the next level,” actor Charlie Sheen flew to the Middle East today with 650 tons of cocaine and… Read more

‘SNOW BLOWERS’ – SUBURBAN GANGS ADD NEW THREAT TO WINTER

HAMDEN, CT (SatireWire.com) – For 33-year-old Kevin Embree, it was the moment he realized his quiet Connecticut neighborhood was out of control. “I’m shoveling my driveway on Tuesday,” he recalled,… Read more

BIPARTISAN DATES: THE MORNING AFTER

WASHINGTON D.C. (SatireWire.com) – They went together, as bipartisan dates, to President Obama’s State of the Union address. It didn’t always work out, but at least one happy pair saw… Read more

U.S. TO SELL OFF UNDERPERFORMING STATES

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – Yielding to economic pressure, the U.S. will sell off 11 underperforming states by the end of the year, the White House announced today. Read more

U.S. APOLOGIZES FOR BIDEN’S ‘HU’S ON FIRST’ ROUTINE

WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – The United States formally apologized to China today for the behavior of Vice President Joe Biden, who spent nearly an hour prior to Wednesday's state dinner… Read more

ARIZONA ACCUSED OF 'TRAGEDIZING' POLITICS

TUCSON, AZ (SatireWire.com) -- Accusing the Arizona shootings of callously "tragedizing" politics, hundreds of media pundits gathered in this stricken city today in a vigil for shallow partisanship and angry… Read more

U.S. TO FORGET AFGHANS AHEAD OF 2014 SCHEDULE

KABUL, COUNTRY NEXT TO PAKISTAN (SatireWire.com) -- Vice President Joe Biden today vowed America will not repeat past mistakes by abandoning Afghanistan after U.S. troops leave, but will instead begin… Read more
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