BERKELEY, CAL. (SatireWire.com) -- In a commencement speech few are likely to forget, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg today urged the University of California's Class of 2011 to follow their dreams,…
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WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) — Dragged before Congress, oil executives on Thursday denied that industry tax breaks are used to increase profits, saying they are instead used to screw us, which…
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CUPTERINO, CAL. (SatireWire.com) -- Apple iPhones secretly track and record their owners’ location, a potentially devastating privacy breach that experts warn could force people to face the fact that they…
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PALO ALTO, CAL. (SatireWire.com) – In yet another sign of its growing dominance, Facebook today announced it has surpassed masturbation as the world’s most popular way to kill 10 minutes.
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NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – Retailers breathed a sigh of relief today as early Black Friday numbers indicated same-store tramplings were up 22 percent over last year.
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WASHINGTON, D.C. (SatireWire.com) -- Hoping to show it finally understands the problem, the TSA said today passengers sensitive to enhanced pat-downs will be allowed to put their genitals in checked…
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SAN DIEGO (SatireWire.com) -- Caught up in a privacy firestorm already immortalized by the phrase ‘Don’t touch my junk,’ airport screeners today pointed out that they’re not exactly thrilled to…
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SAN DIEGO (SatireWire.com) -- After two harrowing days without an all-you-can-eat buffet, nearly 4,500 people stranded on a Carnival Cruise ship arrived in San Diego today, marking the first time…
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Recognition of Pro-Formalist Movement Gets WorldCom, Andersen Off Hook Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) – In a surprise decision that exonerates dozens of major companies, the U.S. Supreme Court today ruled corporate…
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Gates Bites AOL Rival; Critics Call for End to “Weigh-In Circuses” New York, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) – After a massive brawl involving hundreds of world leaders and business heavyweights, World Economic…
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