Fired eBay Employees Auctioned Off

San Jose, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – As part of the staff cuts it announced yesterday, online auction site eBay said it will not release its employees outright, but will auction them… Read more

KELLOGG'S NAILED FOR BUNDLING

Battle Creek, Mich. (SatireWire.com) – Emboldened by its success against Microsoft, the U.S. Justice Department yesterday accused cereal giant Kellogg’s of “anti-competitive, anti-consumer” practices related to the bundling of small… Read more

AT&T TO CUT WORKFORCE 120 PERCENT

NEW YORK, N.Y. (SatireWire.com) -- AT&T will reduce its workforce by an unprecedented 120 percent by the end of 2001, believed to be the first time a major corporation has… Read more

ENRON ADMITS IT'S REALLY ARGENTINA

Now Massive Ineptitude, Corruption Make More Sense, Analysts Say Houston, Texas (SatireWire.com) – Energy company Enron, which collapsed due to gross mismanagement and insurmountable debt, today confessed to what many… Read more

GOD TAKES STAKE IN FORD

Analysts Quickly Up Earnings Estimates DEARBORN, MICH. (SatireWire.com) – Ford’s stock quadrupled yesterday after the automotive giant announced it agreed to sell 20 percent of the company to the Lord… Read more

DOTCOM CHAIN LETTER REALLY WORKS!

With a Minimal Investment, Net Companies Finally Raking in Real Cash! *********************************************************** DO NOT DELETE THIS! Print it, and read it! THIS “PROGRAM” REALLY WORKS!! ***************************************************************** A GENUINE PERSONAL NOTE… Read more

Airline's New "Fly, Goddamnit" Campaign Not Taking Off

Chicago (SatireWire.com) – Marketing executives from United Airlines said today they are still searching for just the right tone to lure the public back into the skies after their new… Read more

Intel Has Smaller Chips; AMD Has Smaller Employees

Sunnyvale, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – In response to Intel’s statement that it will produce transistors only three atoms wide by 2005, rival chipmaker Advanced Micro Devices announced today that most of… Read more

Vision of Greenspan Sighted in Tree

Eckbridge, Pa. (SatireWire.com) – Thousands of fiscally-orthodox bankers and economists gathered under a tree in this small southwestern Pennsylvania farm yesterday after three local girls claimed they saw a vision… Read more

Yahoo Beats Analysts' Estimates, Dogs

San Diego, Cal. (SatireWire.com) – Internet giant Yahoo!, which this week soundly beat analysts’ estimates, reportedly wasn’t satisfied and beat analysts’ dogs as well. Some analysts even reported getting wedgies.… Read more
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