Philadelphia, Pa. (SatireWire.com) – In a study that has infuriated business and public relations executives, University of Pennsylvania researchers concluded the reason many companies falter is not due to the economy, increases in material costs, or wage pressures, but because the companies are run like shit.
“When a company performs poorly or something goes wrong, it’s long been accepted business practice to blame prevailing market conditions, or a rise in costs, or supply delays, or even a ‘change in the competitive landscape’,” said Greg Kaderle, a professor at Penn’s Wharton School of Business. “But we contend it is also conceivable that some companies are simply run by complete idiots who have no fucking idea what they’re doing.”
Bridgestone/Firestone could not be reached for comment.
*note: the following chart is factual.
| Company | Trouble | Blamed |
| Sohu.com | quarterly results | weak online ad sales |
| Mandalay Resort Group | poor earnings | weather |
| JetForm Corp | quarterly loss | “complex” sales cycles |
| CacheFlow Inc. | earnings | change in “buying trends” |
| Amazon.com | disappointing results | slowing economy |
| Disney | lower earnings | soft ad market; higher programming costs |
| Razorfish | loss, cutbacks | corporate tech spending, more complex Internet projects |
| SeaChange | loss | order delays |
| Ford | tire problems | Firestone |
| Firestone | tire problems | Ford customers |
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